RailHope South Africa Testimonies

Darkness to light

I grew up in a modern Zulu home in South Africa. With eleven million of people, the Zulu population forms the biggest ethnic group in South Africa. I was one of eleven children. The firstborn brother in my family passed away, and in 1997, my other brother was shot dead at my mother’s house on Christmas Day. My mother told me that one of my twin sisters had also passed away before I was born. My father was a Reverend in the traditional African church, as far as I knew him. We were a close family, respecting one another and obeying our parents. My father was a very strict man, keeping us in line with strict punishments.

Poverty

My dad had outbursts of anger sometimes, and we were terrified of him. One year, he fought with his colleagues and was fired from his job. As a married woman, my mother was not allowed to work, so we suffered increasing deprivation. I had to walk a long distance to school because we could not afford the bus fare, and I had nothing to protect me against the cold and rain. Often, we had no food to take to school, and sometimes nothing for supper.

One day, I saw my father pray until tears ran down his face. I had never seen him cry before. That day, he repented and gave his heart to God. He went job hunting the next day and was hired. It was a miracle!

It was tough growing up in a small two-bedroom house with 10 siblings. We slept in every room of the house except the toilet. Sometimes, we would go out into the fields to pick herbs (imfino, similar to spinach) just to have something to eat. When my older siblings finished school, there was no money for further tertiary education, and they couldn’t earn a living. It seemed like we would never be able to escape the vicious cycle of poverty.

A song of hope

When times were hard, I often sang a Zulu song that gave me hope and allowed me to escape my situation for a while. The chorus goes “Maningakhathazeki ukhona ubaba, izinhliziyo zenu mazingakhathazeki ukhona ubaba”, meaning “Don’t let your heart be troubled, there is a heavenly Father.” When I sang it, my heartfelt hope, peace and contentment despite my circumstances. I remember that in my final year of school, I couldn’t go to school for two weeks because my school shoes were beyond repair. Fortunately, a friend of mine gave me some shoes belonging to her elder sister, who had finished school. Unbelievably, they were my exact size. I believe that God provided and made a way for me to complete school. I could write a whole book of stories telling how God’s hand was over my life, meeting my needs.

Religious contradictions,

What I could not understand, though, was that my father turned back to ancestral worship when we were in need, despite being a Christian. He would sacrifice animals to his ancestors. Sangomas – witch doctors in Southern Africa, acting as mediators and considered obsessed by the spirit of an ancestor – would promise that things would be fine if we just slaughtered a cow, goat or chicken. When my father retired and held a retirement feast, he made sacrifices to my grandfather in the belief that he would bring us good luck. In three months, R30,000 (2,000 €) were used up, and we were back in poverty. Increasingly, I understood that the advice of the sangomas did not add up. They claimed to be helping us, but in reality, they were leading us back into poverty. I saw this mixing of Christianity with ancestral worship as a deep contradiction.

Terrible nightmares

In 2002, I got my first permanent job at Transnet as a Train driver’s assistant. I moved out of my parents’ house and got married three years later. My life seemed to be going well, but I lacked love, peace and contentment. Over time, I became involved in ancestral worship myself and started believing the promises of the sangomas. However, I noticed that these people never said anything good to me. I was always left more stressed and depressed, never content. I went to church occasionally, but didn’t pray and never really read the word of God outside of the church. For some reason, I still believed in the ancestors and sacrificed to them, but things were not getting better. In fact, they got worse because I opened the door to the ancestor spirit in my new home. My marriage was not what I wanted it to be, and we struggled in most areas. My husband did not believe in the God of the Bible. I received no recognition or advancement in my job at Transnet. Over time, I did not enjoy my work as a train driver. I also had terrible nightmares every night. One of my nightmares was having a runaway train, seeing the father of my child sleeping with me in my dreams. This reminded me of the father of my child forcing himself on me when I was 18 years old, and I gave birth to his daughter. My daughter passed away from childhood seizures when she was four years old. Other nightmares of my parents were chasing me as if wanting to kill me. I knew that something was wrong, and things were even worse for my siblings. My self-esteem was very low, and I was plagued by suicidal thoughts. I became increasingly apathetic and just wanted to end my life.

A shocking pattern

One day, I felt the deep desire to seek God again. I started going to church, where I practised my life of faith, but I had no connection with God outside the church. Uncontrollable demonic emotions like deep sorrow, hate, anger and hopelessness took over. I could not understand why this was happening, as I was going to church again. I would often have near-car accidents, face misconduct charges at work, and people hated me for no reason. I was lonely, felt miserable and wanted to end my life again because everything had become so unbearable.

So, I went to a spiritualist, who told me, “I see a shadow behind you, like a woman covered in black, following you everywhere you go. This shadow wants to possess you. This spirit cannot stop you from going to church, so it comes and chases you in your dreams.” I started researching spiritualism and ancestor worship online and was shocked at the pattern I recognised in my own life. These demonic spirits are destructive embodied beings and they were pursuing me. I realised that by engaging in ancestral worship I had opened my life up to God’s opponent, Satan, to whom the evil spirits are subjects. Now he wanted to claim and destroy my life and the lives of my family members. In the space of five years, four close family members died. My brother was shot dead in my house, and I lost my four-year-old daughter to an illness. Then my mother and I became very ill. I was getting thinner by the day, and the doctors could not tell me what was wrong. I was ready to give up when I was transferred to a new doctor, who diagnosed lung disease. My mother was suffering from high blood pressure, with her heart threatening to stop every time she was upset or angry. 

God answered me

I started seeking the truth about my sufferings by reading the Word of God every day, the Bible. Moreover, I was fasting once a week, praying as long as I needed to and looking for answers to my problems. I sought the Lord with all my heart, and in my distress, He answered me. One day, my mother and I went to a pastor in search of deliverance. Before we could even say why we had come to him, he started sharing scriptural warnings and guidance about ancestral worship. It was a miracle! Although we were resistant to change, God used that pastor to reveal the root cause of all our problems. I started searching the scriptures myself and slowly became convinced that I needed to leave the wrong ways behind. I remember reading Jeremiah 17:7: “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him”. This promise, and other verses like the first commandment (Exodus 20:3 “You shall have no other Gods before me”), spoke to me personally, revealing that I should not rely on or serve other powers and gods. God is the one true and faithful God who keeps his promises. He loves us so much that He came to us as God the Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus gave His life to save us from destructive powers and bondages. He wants to have a close relationship with our Heavenly Father through his son, Jesus Christ.

Charity

Why have you killed me?

I was born in 1963, in Kinshasa, the capital of the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC). My parents were wealthy. My dad made trades as a successful tradesman between Belgium and the DRC and was therefore often travelling. When I was two years old, my family emigrated to Belgium. I had a happy childhood with eight siblings in a big house in a beautiful Flemish village north of Brussels.

God was always a reality 

As a child, I used to go to church on Sundays; we did not understand a word of the Catholic service, as it was held in Latin. But, I was fascinated by the church, the statues and the colourful glass windows. Even though I barely understood the concept of faith, it was still clear to me that God exists and that he is holy. At school, I became a more and more successful student as the years went by. I especially loved the lessons on the subject of religion, where I listened to stories of Jesus and was drawn to them. I also liked listening to the beautiful songs. Even now, these song lyrics stay with me: I want to sing your name my whole life, Lord. 

Look for someone else!

During my high school years, I visited a monastery and concerned myself with faith. In my simple room, there was a bible on the desk. I read the bible hoping that God would talk to me, but I didn’t understand anything, and I heard nothing. Nevertheless, the stay at the monastery was important for the following years of my life, as upon returning home, I had the clear impression that God would talk to me in my heart. I understood that he was encouraging me to devote my life to His service. I shouted loudly: „No, Lord, look for someone else, I do not want to be a nun!” At that time, I believed that one could only serve God with one’s life either as a nun or as a priest. However, I wanted to get married one day and have children. Nevertheless, this experience had a profound effect on me, because I experienced God’s speaking as a reality. 

Suddenly pregnant

I was a well-behaved child, and after successfully graduating from high school, I began to study at university. While at university, I had my first relationships with men. They promised me heaven on earth, and I played the dangerous game….until I suddenly got pregnant at the age of 19. What a shock! I knew that I wanted to keep the baby, even though the child’s father had run off long before the baby was born.  I thought that I would move in with a friend and give birth to my child. But then my mother had a very difficult time due to a conflict with one of my sisters. Dad had exited our lives a few years ago. I felt that the shame of being pregnant, with an unplanned pregnancy, would be too much for my mother to bear because she would feel I had disgraced our family. I simply did not want to hurt her, and so, I had a dilemma and asked myself, “Do I kill my baby or do I hurt my Mum?” In the end, I decided to have an abortion, but I suffered tremendously. The following night, I had a dream. In my dream, Jesus appeared and asked, “Why did you kill me?” I desperately asked for forgiveness, but I could not forgive myself. 

In search of meaning

My Mum had to go to Kinshasa and stay there for a while, in order to solve the financial problems of my family. I, therefore, had to take care of my younger siblings. I continued studying and moonlighting to scratch a living. The abortion still played on my mind, but I had so many things to do, and I did not have much time to think about it. 

Soon, I was totally exhausted and therefore susceptible to consoling and encouraging words spoken by a much older friend of my family. He listened to me and gave me advice that sidetracked me. I soon began to trust him and fell in love with him, but he was married! Another complicated situation and another dilemma. I did not want to do the same to another woman as my father did to my mother. Why was I so attached to him? During the 18 months of our relationship, I broke up with him about 10 times. 

I confided in my sister, who was a year younger than me. She said, „Madeline, my dear, only Jesus can give you the love you are looking for!” My sister told me that she had a personal relationship with Jesus and that she was reconciled with God. This was pure, unconditional love, and I wanted to experience it too. I wanted to exchange it for the adulterous love I was not entitled to, and that was not good for me. My sister encouraged me to break up with the married man. After I had prayed about it intensely, I was able to find the strength to end the relationship – but it was only with God’s help! 

Broken bonds 

So was that easy with faith? I understood that Jesus had offered help to me through my sister. But how could I connect with Him in the same way that I did with her? I began to attend the church where my sister felt so good. During a service, the pastor invited people to enter into a personal relationship with Jesus. He explained that Jesus paid the price on the cross, and took the punishment I deserved for all my sins, and for my messed-up, complicated life, simply for me, Madeline. Yes, that was what I wanted: I wanted to be loved, freed and justified!  

On that Sunday, several bonds were broken in my life: first of all, of course, that of adultery. But also the bond of resentment against my father and numerous other men of my nation who had abandoned their wives and families. I could forgive them. Also, the bond of my struggle with difficult life circumstances was broken, as I gained a real footing in life and could take the next steps cautiously. Thank God that all these bonds could be broken through the power of reconciliation with my creator! 

Spreading love 

Since then, I have wanted to spread love with my life, giving courage to others. So many people stray from the right path and overlook that there is marvellous help, close to their hearts, if only they would recognise it. I had the opportunity for some time to work as a prison minister. I realised that the words guilt and atonement have completely different meanings in a prison: a lot of inmates are open to a personal encounter with the guiltless and sinless Jesus. 

I took my time in finding a relationship with a man. I finally got married in 1989. But after 20 years of marriage, we got divorced. Today I have three wonderful adult children and already 4 grandchildren. I am now 60 years old, and I am happy when my children tell me that I gave them something priceless: faith in Jesus! 

In the world of railway stations

My story would not be told in this magazine if I were not working in railways: For 12 years, I have worked in customer services and ticketing for the Belgian state railways SNCB. I love the direct contact with people. To be there for them, to give a smile, to provide important information, de-stress those who are not accustomed to travelling via railway, to calm those who fear arriving late at the destination due to the delay of a train, to find simple solutions, to reassure and serve people with my presence. I always imagine when I see the mass of travellers in a railway station: they are magnificently created and loved by God, and if they want, they too can be freed through Jesus. I know everyone is precious to God and loved by Him, and it is with this in mind that I want to share that love with everyone I meet.  

Madeleine Mampengu

■ Born in 1963 in DRC 

■ Raised with 8 siblings

■ Inadvertently became pregnant at the age of 19 

■ Married in 1989, divorced in 2011, has 3 adult children 

■ Lives in Liege, Belgium

■ Job: ticket sales and customer services with the Belgian state railway (SNCB) 

■ Belgian Point of contact for Railhope International since 2021 

Edited from the original French 

by Lukas Buchmueller, 

SBB customer service staff

JESUS!! You are going to have to come and get me…..

….so we in fact were non practicing Hindus. We had no names for the gods we were supposedly serving. They were never mentioned to us by our parents and neither were we taught to go to the gods for things we needed or required. My dad taught us that hard work and perseverance will get you wherever you needed to go. He would teach us daily about truth and tenacity…..and would often teach certain life lessons like “if you fail try again”; ‘failure is a stepping stone to success’; “a rolling stone gathers no moss”; “good fences make good neighbours’; …these were few of his favourites. So from hereon as children we all focused on being good and living up to what we were learning. And life as we know it was normal…..until that terrible day on the 12th of March 1997 …our lives were turned upside down. My mum met with a tragic accident that claimed her life, she was only of 34yrs old….and there was 5 children …with me being the eldest.

From hereon I was no longer a 19yr old teenager but ….was thrown into the adult world caring for 4 younger siblings and my dad. And I had still continued with my tertiary studies…I was in the 2nd year of my studies and decided to pursue my dreams as well. My life revolved around my studies and my family….I had no social life like a normal teenager….then again I didn’t know what was normal anymore and I was far from being a teenager. So I just carried on …..with the new routine. I carried on like this for 5 years …..with no help from elders……just us kids against the world.

I had graduated in 1995 and started my first job immediately with a good company. And the same routine carried on…but now I was raising 4 teenagers…and (due to the financial constraints my dad chose to work 18 hrs a day – to provide for us) it was tough and the demands of work and home took its toll on me. My best friend began to see the effects of the burnout and had invited me on a weekend away to Mooi River.

That weekend changed my life forever. Unbeknown to both my friend and I, there was a church retreat at the same venue. On the Sunday morning we planning to leave…I was approached by 2 ladies  (from the church group – one later became my mother in law) and one of them told me she had a dream about me….and she saw a light behind me ….she used the word “glory of the Lord”…I off course did not understand what that meant. Anyway after that encounter, we had breakfast and was getting packed to go back to Durban. For some strange reason I wanted to go inside the church for the church service and I beckoned to my friend to come with.

The minute I stepped in…..something began to happen to me on the inside…(it was March and up in Mooi River it was freezing cold in the morning) but I was feeling uncomfortably warm. The worship team began to sing “a pure heart” a song I never heard before…but somehow I connected with me in strange new way.   And as the preacher began ministering on the love of Christ and about the heart attitude of a Christian…….he was looking at me strangely after a while…he looked straight at me and called me to the front….my legs turned to lead, when I realized he was calling me ….and he told everybody to look at me and that the Glory of  God was all over me…so like an out of body experience I walked down the stairs and got to the altar…..in front of me was a huge stained glass window and through it, I could see Mooi River flowing and I also saw some bucks hoping around and on either side of the chapel in line with where  I was standing was 2 huge wooden doors and these doors were opened. And what I experienced next was out of this world. The preacher started to pray for me …and asked me if I wanted to surrender to Christ and I answered No No No….and the wind that was coming through those two doors began to blow right through me and that is when I realized my cheeks were wet with tears so was my shirt and unknown people were giving me their hankerchiefs to dry my eyes…..the tears never stopped  (from that Sunday morning until Wednesday night)…I cried and cried for 5 days…..my boss at work felt so sorry for me she asked one on the technicians who was a Christian to come to my assistance….and he took me into his office and explained this is the work of  the holy Spirit. And then I remembered that when I was leaving Mooi River that Sunday after lunch time, I said to Jesus, “I know about you …..you gonna have to come and get me ..I am not coming to you”. (I think I also was worried what my father would say…he didn’t want us to be gullible and believe smooth talking religious people)

And come and rescue me is exactly what the Lord  did……on Wednesday evening I sat my dad down and explained everything that took place and told him the only way I would experienc some kind of peace is if went to church. And God bless his soul….he said, “I can see how this is affecting you…you must do what’s best for you”.

I had seen my grandmum on countless occasions go on her knees and confess she is a sinner (she was a Christian)…so I did just that I went on my knees and welcomed Christ into my life.  And I went to bed…when I got up in the morning the tears had dried up and I contacted the church I had met in Mooi River …I needed directions to their ministry and have not looked back from that day forth. Today my whole family is faithfully serving the Lord…and my passion for Christ is greater than it ever was.

All glory to God:

Hazel Govender

900 Gram Miracle by Thandi Sabelo

I was born again at the age of 13 years, but rededicated my life to Christ with better understanding at the age of 26 years. By this time I was passionate about being a child of God, all I wanted to hear and be involved in was about my Father’s business. With my grandmom’s relentless early hour prayers, I guess I had no choice, the hand of God was upon me.

My testimony is about my son, who is himself a testimony. When I was pregnant with my son I had a few complications, in and out of hospital. On my 5th month of pregnancy I was admitted in hospital as my Gynaecologist had recommended to observe me for a day. Shortly after my husband had left for the evening hospital visit, I felt a sharp pain and called the nurse. I told her that the pain was getting worse and I felt that the baby was about to come out. She totally dismissed it as impossible as I was only 26 weeks pregnant (out of the 40 weeks for a full term baby).

For my comfort, she told me she would go get the machine to check my tummy to ascertain what was happening. She had hardly gone for 2 minutes when my waters broke and before I knew it I felt an unbearable pain of a push which was followed by the baby sliding out to hit the end of the bed. By God’s grace the nurse got back on time to quickly snatch the baby before he fell on the floor. By this time I was in too much pain I couldn’t even talk, my gynaecologist rushed into hospital wearing pyjamas. They rushed me to theatre for a clean up, all I can remember was one of the nurses saying the baby “was” a boy. By then my heart sank at the word “was” as the baby didn’t cry.
What was to follow was a 3 months of hardship and pain as our son was in hospital fighting for his life. He had all types of machines all over his body, he weighed 900 grams, not even 1 kg and had hair over his body. His Paediatrician told us in no uncertain terms that his chances of survival were slim. We were admitted in ICU with other premature babies. In the ward there were other mommies in the same situation, we spent long hours in tears as mommies as we were all desperate for the survival of our babies. During this point I literally stayed in hospital, only went home to take a bath and quickly return. Even my maternity leave was extended from 4 to 6 months.
When other babies, who weighed even more than mine started to pass on I took a decision that as a child of God my baby was not going to die. I wiped the tears and started engaging in prayers and declarations. I knew who I am (a child of the Most High) and I knew the power I have in Christ and I wasn’t going to let the enemy steal our God-given gift. I was praying in the parking lot, in the mommy’s room, at the ward, at home, literally my food was prayer. Indeed man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from God. The more I prayed the more the doctor told me negative reports about my baby’s survival. That even if he survived, he would have health complications. By this time I had shut the door to his reports and decided to take God’s report about our baby’s life, which is that he shall not die but live and declare the works of the Lord. At one point, it was hardly an hour after we had left the hospital to go home to refresh when we were urgently called back and told that the baby had stopped breathing. Remembering that the Word of God is power, we are able to send it anywhere and it doesn’t return void. We invoked the same faith used by the centurion when he said Lord just say the word and my servant will be healed.

​

Our baby started to make lots of improvement and after a month he finally weighed 1 kg, this was such a big achievement that the hospital issued a certificate of 1 kg attainment and we celebrated. Shortly after this achievement, the baby started having growth deficiency illnesses. The more we prayed, the more the enemy was fighting wanting us to give up. When light is about to come, it seems darker. The doctor advised that the baby needed more of my breast milk for proper healthy nutrients. I struggled to have milk coming out from my breasts, which is what my baby needed most. I pressed on in prayers, declaring an overflow of milk on my body and God heard my prayers. Before long I was expressing half a bottle from next to a few drops. My baby was fed the milk through the tubes and survived through the jondisitis and other related illnesses. 

A friend of ours, who is now a Pastor came to visit us after a long time to tell us about a dream he had. He was not even aware of our situation when he told us that he dreamt that there was a funeral and we were burying our baby. He prayed with us before he left. We sat up with my husband until midnight praying when we decided to make a request to God that if He would grant us our son’s life we would feed families who are needy. We made this commitment putting our trust in God, the One who never fails. Since then we have never looked back on being God’s gloves to the needy.

Having made effective and all kinds of prayers for our baby, including the commitment, we got to know Dad as a Faithful God. Miraculously the child’s machine breathing statistics went up, which meant he didn’t need breathing assistance of machines anymore. Shortly after this he recovered from all sorts of illnesses caused by the premature birth. Before we knew it we were packing our baby’s clothes and were discharged. Since birth, I only had held my baby twice in my arms. You can imagine the cold place it was every day to go home without my baby but God, My Father, Restorer, Healer, Provider made a way where there was no way. 

As a result of our miraculous experience, we told our story to many other mommies who were in the same situation as ours. We would even get yearly invites from the hospital to celebrate our boy’s birthday with them and the nurses would shed tears at the sight of my boy remembering that ours was a lost cause. They called him “Miraculous Baby”. Our situation was really for God to be glorified and we continue to share our testimony in the different platforms. I wouldn’t have grown in prayer and fellowship with the Holy Spirit if we didn’t have such a painful situation. Indeed I know I am strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Today my boy is a healthy 10 year old who is in grade 4. 

We give all the glory to Our God Almighty! I love Him more than I love myself.

God Bless. Thandi

Spirits of the Enemy by Trini Kistan

​

Our family were devout Hindus, by this I mean we followed all traditions of our forefathers and tried to follow Hinduism to the best of our ability.

My dad worked in South African Railways as a labourer and later became a Tally Clerk. He was also a drug addict and consumed alcohol to the extent that my siblings, my mum and I were physically, mentally and psychologically abused. As much as he committed these awful deeds, there was a side to him that took care of us financially and ensured that we finished school.

In a nutshell I hated school. I hated life and I hated my dad. In my late teens I found consolation in my friends. I obviously had no adult guidance in life orientation and slowly turned to alcohol, drugs and smoking cigarettes. My common way of speech was vulgarity. Having no vision after matric, I did part time jobs to earn an income until in 1988 when I was employed by The South African Railways. A new era started in my life when at the age of 22 I married Resh who was a Christian. As time progressed I started to do what my dad did to my mum and family. My wife, who had never been exposed to abuse, now started to experience it at my hand. Even as a Christian she was forced to obey my religious beliefs and perform all rituals pertaining to Hinduism which resulted in her backsliding from her faith.

In the October 1995 I suddenly became sick at work and could not eat. The symptoms were similar to those of influenza (flu). I returned to work after being off sick for a week and upon my return became sick again. Only this time symptoms of anxiety and depression set in. I began to vomit and lose weight. Sleep could only be achieved through a combination of sleeping tablets and brandy. At this stage I smoked almost 60 cigarettes a day and drank almost every day whilst being sick.

I prayed to all my gods to help me but still remained sick. At this stage I was renting property and my mother suggested I come back home. On my return she realised the seriousness of my condition immediately took me to a Hindu temple.  A woman at the temple performed a ritual and by going into a trance like state revealed that someone close to me had bewitched me (in our terminology ‘put muti’). I was cursed to lose my job and get sick. To rid me of the curse I was to buy a whole lot of stuff and perform some kind of ritual. This result still left me sick. I was at this point that I lost all hope. I had been off sick from work for 3 weeks. It was when my employer started to question my absence from work that I contemplated suicide.

It was on the 26th October 1995, at my deepest point of despair, that I turned to my wife and challenged her by committing that if her God would heal me – that I would serve Him for the rest of my life. She reached out behind her wardrobe and pulled out a small Bible that I once threw out the window and she started reading from the book of PSALMS. It was only then that a peace and calm overcame my spirit and I fell asleep without sleeping pills and alcohol.

​

The next morning I awoke with a new refreshed spirit, but the enemy was fighting for my soul. I told my wife I wanted to go to Church down the road as they are having a service in a little tent. That afternoon we went to the Church. I had developed a terrible fever, something like the feeling of a ball running from my head to my belly. The preacher called me and said to that I have come to Jesus tonight. He laid his hands on me the next thing I knew an electric bolt of lightning had hit me and I was flat on the floor.

When I awoke I could not stand nor walk, the power of God filled me and I was totally healed, delivered and saved. My sickness and bad habits were gone. My vulgar language changed to the language of the Spirit.  When I returned to work all I wanted was to see was revival. I wanted everyone at work to experience Gods power as I did. In one years’ time my entire family was saved, and revival broke out at Wentworth Diesel Depot, souls started to get touched as we gathered to pray. This God that we serve is awesome, Blessing and Honour and Power be unto Him.

God Bless.

Trini